Where I Watched it: Paramount Plus

English Audio Description?: Yes

All of this Pet Sematary build up has led to this moment. The moment when Paramount wisely chose not to send this prequel to theatres, and instead dump it on their streaming service. I have poked fun at previous iterations, but Bloodline is truthfully the worst in the series. It does have some talented cast members pop up, sadly not in the leading roles, and is somewhat based on the lore created by the stories Judd tells in both Pet Sematary films. It is just really dull.

That’s not to say that the audio description is bad. often, I find that terrible movies have audio description that seems far better than the movie itself. That is the case here, as the written narration is crafted so that you are told about very specific props or costume pieces on set that become relevant as the scene moves forward. Some of them are just passing references, like an article of clothing mentioned that later is needed to try and stop some bleeding. Others are more obvious, like an axe. It’s a horror movie. you don’t mention an axe if you don’t intend on using it.

But the direction is clunky. I never realized how small this town was in the previous films. It felt larger than this. in the later films, they have a hospital for someone to work at, or a veterinary office, but in this prequel, this town has less than 100 people living there, and two are trying to leave. Judd and his girlfriend are trying to leave the town, when they get sidetracked by a grieving father that buries his Vietnam War victim son in the no-no area.

I think if we learned anything in 2022, was that Prey proved you can reinvent and truly bring a fresh new vision to a series. Pet Sematary would have benefitted from this, instead of trying to feature length a story Judd takes about ten seconds to explain in two previous films. Don’t you want to see the story of how that land became sacred to begin with? or, how long that land has been that way? What if we did a Civil War era film, where a soldier gets buried back then? Or even further back? Shed yourself of the feeling that everything you do must have a direct connection to King’s novel, and go into your own creativity and bring something to this franchise that is decidedly original. It’s got to be a lot better than this.

I felt like I watched three films to prep for watching easily the worst in the series. There’s really nothing to like about this film, as it does nothing terribly original to warrant its existence. Remember, this story is already alluded to twice, so making a film about it suggests that Paramount did some research that audiences wanted this. I can’t imagine this is true.

Go your own way.in 2023, we should have seen a totally fresh take on this concept. Instead, we got a stretched for time prequel that will easily be forgotten.

Final Grade: D+