Where I Watched Them: Paramount Plus

English Audio Description?: Yes

Starring: Harrison Ford

Featuring: Karen Allen, Kate Capshaw, Sean Connery, Cate Blanchett, John Rhys-Davies, Shia LaBeouf, and Ke Huy Kwon, among others.

Directed By: Steven Spielberg

In preparation for watching the final indiana Jones films, i revisited all four films that precede it. From the first to the last, it is unlikely you’ll be surprised which is my least favorite, but you may be surprised by which is my favorite. Still, this is just a cursory look at the franchise.

Starting at Raiders Of The Lost Ark, the audio description here does a fantastic job of really kicking things off. The audio description in the franchise does vary from film to film, with different narrators, so expect each film to have a slightly different flavor. But considering Raiders of The Lost Ark establishes the entire feeling of the franchise, as the adventurer and archaeologist known as Indiana Jones bursts onto the scene, we get to know even more about what kind of man he is. This establishes him so well, and it’s a great film. No wonder a bunch of kids got together to remake it. And the audio description at the end is truly mind blowing. I forgot how intense this was, and I know it’s been captured and turned into memes before, but this PG rating is very questionable. The audio description makes everything sound way more intense.

Then I got to Temple Of Doom, one of the films cited as a reason PG-13 exists, and what I really noticed on the rewatch through the film is that the chest closes up after. I think I was always so focused on the shock value of what just happened, that without someone pointing that out, I really hadn’t noticed. Of course, no one could have projected Ke Huy Kwon would win an Oscar so many years later, or that Steven Spielberg had his future wife in the lead female role, but Temple Of Doom is a solid film. It’s also the film that because of how the temple goes, with the traps, if you have been on the ride at Disneyland, I think it’s actually inspired by this. However, it very oddly acts like characters who weren’t around in the first film are lifelong companions to Indy, and the artifact Indy is after here isn’t as interesting, or mind blowing, as the Ark Of the Covenant.

The Last Crusade, where we smartly added Connery to the series, is my favorite. Blame nostalgia. Because of my age, this was my first experience with indiana, so for me, this is my Raiders, and the other two are like prequels. That’s what i was saying about not being able to predict my favorite, because while Raiders is terrific, I still put it a half step below Last Crusade. Ilsa comes across as a believable damsel in distress when she needs to be, and the Nazi’s make for great villains.

Then we have the Crystal Skull, and while Spielberg is terrific at the adventure part, and bringing things back from the past, I’m actually shocked at how much he reveals at the beginning. That’s the reason I am only marginally a fan of this, because from the very beginning, he shows his alien hand, and that’s the wrong call. I hated it the first time I saw it, and on repeated viewings, I see how he can manipulate the script so we don’t know what the end has in store. What the other treasures like the Ark and the Grail had going for them is that when we finally got there, no one knew what was next. If the aliens had turned out to be the answer at the end, it would have been better. Shia gets blamed a lot for this film, and he’s fine. I wish he had been given more freedom to be himself, instead of taking what made Shia interesting in films like Disturbia and Transformers and making him tone it down. His charisma is lost.

So that’s a quick rundown. All four films have audio description on paramount Plus, and even the worst Indiana Jones film is still better than the best of some other franchises.

Final Grades:

Raiders Of The lost Ark: A

Temple Of Doom: A-

The Last Crusade: A

Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull: B-