Category: Movie Review

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A Thousand And One

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Peaecock English Audio Description?: Yes I knew nothing going in. I know that sounds like a rarity, but frequently I have very little information, as I don’t watch that many previews (since most don’t have audio description). With this title, I had a friend see it in theatres and recommend it to me, but I wasn’t engaged enough to track it down theatrically. A few weeks later, it’s on Peacock. This film is best served cold. I say that knowing that it was slow starting, and I wasn’t fully invested in the film for a while. … Continue reading A Thousand And One

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White Men Can’t Jump (2023)

John Stark

Where I Watched It: In A Multiverse, Clearly. This Can’t Be Real. But, hulu. English Audio Description Provided By: PixelLogic Narrated By: Laura Post What do we have here? Oh look, the same guy who thought a remake of House Party was what 2023 needed was also hired to remake White men Can’t jump. Perhaps, if we’re really fucking lucky, he’ll put Tyga in a remake of Friday. Street ball rules apply. First to eleven, win by two. Me versus this film. The film checks the ball, and immediately introduces me to people who are not Woody Harrelson and Wesley … Continue reading White Men Can’t Jump (2023)

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Ant Man and the Wasp: QuantumMania

John Stark

where I Watched it: Disney Plus English Audio description? Provided By: Deluxe Narrated By: Jedidiah Barton Marvel has been getting a little raked over the coals ever since we snapped back to reality. if you don’t move too far, you can find someone complaining about the state of Marvel films. is it a fair comparison? Debatable. I think two of my least favorite films have been released in the last few years, with Black Widow and Eternals being very underwhelming. The latter took an interesting villain in Taskmaster and somehow made them boring, but thought gender flipping them would make … Continue reading Ant Man and the Wasp: QuantumMania

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Dungeons And Dragons: honor Among Thieves

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Paramount Plus English Audio Description?: Yes I think we should wait for Jonathan. Well, I hope we can all agree this is better than the last big screen attempt at a Dungeons and Dragons movie. I say this with the knowledge that I’m not a D&D fan, so I’m not sure how those dice rollers feel about this comic take on their game. but, it reminds me of the last cinematic attempt at power Rangers. Way better than anyone thought it would be, yet still somehow never got a sequel. The whole cast is entertaining, but … Continue reading Dungeons And Dragons: honor Among Thieves

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Crater

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Disney plus English Audio Description?: Yes Last year,I stumbled upon a random straight-to-video Disney Plus release with Better Nate Than Never that wound up being one of the best of almost 300 films I saw in 2022. There is a chance that Crater, which really took me by surprise, will be that film this year. I’ve already participated in spirited online debates defending this film, which hails from the director of The Stanford Prison Experiment (shocking, I know). Apparently, the trailers (which I don’t really ever watch anymore), showed a happy movie. Crater is not happy. … Continue reading Crater

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Still: A Michael j Fox Story

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Apple Plus English Audio Description?: Yes This has been a pretty solid year for documentaries about individuals in the business, especially those still alive, who are getting to contribute to their own stories. Pamela Anderson, Judy Blume, and Wynonna Judd. Now, Michael j Fox brings his life story to the big screen. I’m a big Fox fan. I do not care that The Secret of My Success wasn’t a critical darling. i love it. I love Greedy. of course, it goes without saying that Back To the Future is iconic, and his performance in The American … Continue reading Still: A Michael j Fox Story

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The Mother

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Netflix English Audio Description Provided By: international Digial center Written by: Steven Christopher Narrated By: Jamie Lemcheck I enjoy Jenny from the block, and I do wish the best for her career. It’s mostly vapid and forgettable romcoms, but her career has spanned quite a broad period of time. Sandwiched into that spectrum of time are these little glimmers that she’s capable of so much more, and just needs to choose her projects better. Whether your choose to point out her almost Oscar nominated turn in Hustlers or her fan favorite turn as Karen Sisco in … Continue reading The Mother

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Air

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Amazon English Audio Description Provided By: Media Access Group Narrated by: Inger Tudor Generally by the time I get around to the print versions of my reviews, I’m always a little bit behind my YouTube channel. It’s just so much easier to record and upload, than to construct my thoughts while fighting aggressive auto-correct, and a screen reader that often reads a word that sounds so much like the word I meant to use. But, even with the few more 2023 films I’ve seen since Air, it’s still at number one for me for the year. … Continue reading Air

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Ever After: A Cinderella Story

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Disney Plus English Audio Description Provided By: Deluxe Narrated By: Marsha Bartenelli Perhaps you chose this review expecting me to tell you how I’ve loved this film for all of it’s years. Sadly, despite this film having its own following, I must admit that i did not see this until just now. not that there aren’t a dozen Cinderella stories out there, starring anyone from Hilary Duff to Camilla Cabello. If there’s one thing that doesn’t need a retread, it’s probably this phoenix that rises from her ashes every couple of years in a new iteration. … Continue reading Ever After: A Cinderella Story

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Smokey and the Bandit

John Stark

Where i Watched it: Netflix English Audio Description Provided By: Deluxe Narrated by: Tanzi Alexander Don’t get to excited. I already checked Netflix, and the sequel doesn’t ahve audio description. This was my first time through on this film. It always looked so cheesy, and it always felt like one of those films my Dad was supposed to love but its appeal was meant to elude me. however, as i sit here in the midst of a tenth film in the Fast and Furious franchise, knowing one day I’ll have to explain this period in time and what a “Vin … Continue reading Smokey and the Bandit

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John wick: Chapter 3: Parabellum

John Stark

Where I Watched It: not On peacock English Audio Description Available?: Yes If you follow my every move, you already heard what i had to say about having watched john Wick on Peacock, and also Chapter 2. Neither had audio description, but both left the service at the beginning of May. I last saw them on FreeVee. The problem is, I’m still trying to finish this cycle, and be ready for Chapter 4, but I’ve also never seen Parabellum. it was easier for me to sit through the first two films without audio description to allow myself the opportunity to … Continue reading John wick: Chapter 3: Parabellum

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But I’m A Cheerleader

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Amazon English Audio Description?: No When you first come out of the closet, the first thing you are given (aside from a Rupaul lexicon so you know all the trendiest phrases) is a copy of But I’m A Cheerleader. I lost mine. I know it’s around here somewhere, but according to the marketing of bros, nothing existed before that, so perhaps this was just a 90’s fever dream. The 90’s certainly were a very interesting time in the evolution of independent cinema, especially queer cinema. I sadly grew up in the Bible Belt, so our movie … Continue reading But I’m A Cheerleader

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A Man Called Otto

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Netflix English Audio Description?: Yes Narrated By: Andrea Breton You’re a mean one, Mr. Grinch. While I am unfamiliar with both the original film and book on which this English language adaptation is based, I suspect there are many like me. I definitely think we should do a better job of helping American audiences enjoy International cinema, instead of just remaking it. but, without remakes, we’d never have gotten The Departed or Coda. Not that A Man Called Otto is necessarily on that level, but with Tom Hanks being in three films in 2022, this is … Continue reading A Man Called Otto

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Inside

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Peacock English Audio Description?: Yes Do you love Willem Dafoe? I don’t mean, do you enjoy him on occasion. I mean, if we were in some desert island scenario and it was just you and Willem Dafoe, would you be OK? because, he’s basically the only person in this movie. There are some other really bit parts from actors seen on security cameras, or in dream sequences, but the entire film is Willem Dafoe playing a thief who gets trapped in an upscale condo fully decked out with all the smart house elements, and the owners … Continue reading Inside

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The Thing (2011)

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Netflix English Audio Description?: Yes Narrated By: Miles Neff Miles is such a great narrator. I love how he seemingly is always fully engaged in whatever he’s narrating, giving it that fanboy charm that helps to keep you engaged. It works great for the Star Wars films he’s narrated, but when it comes to this remake of The Thing, which features some of the weirdest, goriest, most creative body horror I’ve experienced in audio description, I kinda feel like Santa Claus got caught watching porn or something. I associate Miles with happiness. This is not happy. … Continue reading The Thing (2011)