I’m sure Hulu, Disney, 20th Century Fox, and whoever else associated with The First Omen feels triggered by me. Here’s the deal. I’ve been a pretty equal opportunity advocate, going after every company for their missed accessibility opportunities. Just a few days ago, I commented on the lack of audio description on The Big City Greens Movie, which seems odd considering how much of an effort Disney has been making at getting branded content described, mainly films and not necessarily shows. Vault Disney titles, D-Quels, and Disney Channel Original Movies are all the unlikely candidates, when inherited titles like Tom Hank’s Big dosn’t have audio description, and neither does most of the X-Men universe. I called out Netflix for Godzilla Minus One. I posted a rant about using TTS audio description on the documentary short about Beyoncé’s effect on country music available now on MAX. I’ve taken numerous swipes at streamers so don’t think blind people exist, like AMC Plus, Starz, and CrunchyRoll. So, yeah, we’re having another accessibility conversation, and this time it’s again Hulu.

It does start to feel like all roads lead to Hulu, but the rest of the services all have crimes against the VI. Not real crimes, but Netflix should be putting audio description on their Oscar nominees, like Roma and Bardo, regardless of country of origin. They aren’t. Amazon should be quality checking their TTS audio description. I’ve seen too many tracks to believe they have a QC department, and don’t just upload whatever Joe Bob gives them. MGM Plus should have audio description on its own platform, not just as a channel add on at Prime. Disney Plus needs to take a look at its library and fill in the Fox gaps. They have films that had audio description, but not on their service. Peacock consistently uploads their own Universal/Dreamworks/Illumination/Focus titles without audio description. Paramount Plus inherited Showtime, which has audio description for their older shows, and older seasons that they aren’t using. And MAX, yes even MAX, still hosts films without tracking down their audio description. Even Apple could do better with making sure films available in the store have audio description. Everyone is guilty of something.

But, today we’re talking about The First Omen. i tried reaching out, and requesting the track, and a month later it still isn’t happening. Granted, Hulu often takes a lifetime to add audio description. They took forever to get the track for The Creator, A Haunting In Venice was not uploaded day and date, and they have yet to use the audio description they created for the second season of Extraordinary. Even The Contestant, a documentary recently added, now has a described version… if you can find it. Instead of just having it with the other audio tracks.

I assume, since the person clearly in charge of this has maintained their employment, that the suggestion is that I would be able to watch the First Omen without audio description, just like a sighted person. You would be wrong.

The film is primarily in English, but does take place in Italy. If sighted people ever see a subtitle, I’ve been shorted a translation. The main character, Margaret looks at paintings by kids, which we don’t know, until she tries talking to a girl about them later. She frequently talks to people who are non-verbal, so we don’t know who she’s talking to. Her roommate might have been naked the first time we meet her, it’s hard to tell. but, it is important later on as they are looking for a very specific mark. Margaret has visions, which she said a priest helped her with as a kid, but she’s also prone to nightmares, which often lead to a jump scare of loud sound, but we never know if any of those are accompanied by images. I couldn’t tell when the movie takes place. It is supposed to be a prequel to the very first Omen, but the best time frame reference we get is a reference to Barbara Streisand. There seems to be a lot of screaming, and since it is a horror movie, I’m sure people die. I have no idea who died, or how. The birthing scene, which is what I think that was, was just a lot of screaming. No context.

That’s all the big stuff. Add to that, I never knew what anyone looked like. I never knew what the set looked like, the school, the nuns, priests, people in the club. I lost track of the time of day, or what day we were on. This movie was painfully diffficult to follow, and I regret the implication that by not providing accessibility I should be fine.

The fact is,we don’t get a blind discount, but only a fraction of the programming has audio description. If we beg for more, we are begging for scraps. I literally have to beg for title by title. Instead of getting sweeping commitments to change, we have to beg, claw, and scream to get one title audio description. And it’s a title that already has a paid for track.

if I’m paying for Hulu, and the implication is that I should then pay additional money to a VOD service like the Apple Store, Prime video, or Fandango At Home, do I get a voucher? A discount on my current subscription for having to go elsewhere for accessibility?

I’m a bitch. I’m an angry ass. But I’m here, because as someone who used to be able to see, I know just how little thought the average sighted person gives to accessibility they do not understand, and do not use. So talking to and advocating for my right to be human, against someone who sees no value, and cannot understand my position, doesn’t realize that part of going hard and all in on audio description, and additional accessibility, Will create a better and more accessible world. that way, if you get a diagnoses, or a family member does, or your kid is born needing accessibility, people like me have tilted at windmills for years to beg, claw, and cry for every ounce of existing accessibility.

I did not know I would be here. You may not know where you will be a year, five years, or ten from now. Do it now. Make the changes now. When you have the power, the job titles, and the opportunities to make sweeping and expansive commitments to accessibility, it might just pay off for you or someone you love one day.

Until that day, i once again have to put Hulu on blast for allowing this situation to go on.

Final Grade: Unwatchable