Disclaimer: I’m a blind film critic. This film does have available audio description.

If you do not know the answer to “who lives in a pineapple under the sea” by now, get out of here. This film is not for you. It unabashedly won’t even try to be for you. I’m not even sure who this is for anymore, as SpongeBob has been around so long, you could see a theater full of families, but also a bunch of thirtysomethings without kids who grew up with the franchise, and have never let go. He now transcends simple branding as just for kids, and instead has become something that depending on when you were first introduced to SpongeBob, it is entirely possible that you are now sharing him with your little ones. To be fair, if Universal ever finishes the Fast franchise, it too has reached the generational connection, which TV shows like The Simpsons, Family guy, Law and order, South Park, and others are already in the mix.

The plot for this is so nonsensical, which is also very SpongeBob. The catalyst for this is SpongeBob’s fear of rollercoasters, which leads to an adventure where he gets roped into the wrong journey, all in the effort to be a big boy, and be brave enough to ride a rollercoaster with Patrick. This makes him an easy mark for a ghost pirate The Dutchman (Mark Hamill) who uses SpongeBob to reverse a curse on him, of course, unbeknownst to SpongeBob.

So while SpongeBob and Patrick head off on a journey that tests their friendship, Mr Krans, Squidward, and Gary team up to rescue him, as Mr Krabs has a dark secret. Plankton and Sandy Cheeks are afterthoughts, so much so that they make a joke about it with sandy.

It is destined to appeal to fans, or any age, and no one else. It feels like it didn’t need to go to theaters, as the plot isn’t grand enough anymore. However, it does keep up the new tradition of mixing animation and live action, having SpongeBob and the gang on land for a brief period of time. Mark Hamill is still one of the greatest voice actors, and his performance here is a lot of fun. Patrick, always given the best one liners, has all the funniest moments in the film, as the dullard flips your understanding of his intelligence, and somehow proving far more useful than one might have assumed.

I’m not really sure any of the SpongeBob sequels have created cinematic excellence, but they all perfectly play to their base. In terms of audio description, while the script is written well, I can’t help but wonder if we couldn’t have chosen a more engaging AD performer. I know who this is, and I typically like her stuff, but for a wild movie like this, where she has a lot of silly shenanigans and kiddie words to use, like “booger” and “fart”, I can’t help but think casting is just as important here. Meet the kids where they are not just in text form, but by having a voice as engaging as the product you are trying to help sell. In an industry increasingly wondering how they can use AI, any chance to show that humans do it better should be taken full advantage of.

It’s just more SpongeBob for an ever broadening audience, as he is now a brand that parents and kids can enjoy equally. Mark Hamill is an inspired choice to ad some flavor.

Fresh: 6.8/10