Category: Movie Review

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Inside

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Peacock English Audio Description?: Yes Do you love Willem Dafoe? I don’t mean, do you enjoy him on occasion. I mean, if we were in some desert island scenario and it was just you and Willem Dafoe, would you be OK? because, he’s basically the only person in this movie. There are some other really bit parts from actors seen on security cameras, or in dream sequences, but the entire film is Willem Dafoe playing a thief who gets trapped in an upscale condo fully decked out with all the smart house elements, and the owners … Continue reading Inside

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The Thing (2011)

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Netflix English Audio Description?: Yes Narrated By: Miles Neff Miles is such a great narrator. I love how he seemingly is always fully engaged in whatever he’s narrating, giving it that fanboy charm that helps to keep you engaged. It works great for the Star Wars films he’s narrated, but when it comes to this remake of The Thing, which features some of the weirdest, goriest, most creative body horror I’ve experienced in audio description, I kinda feel like Santa Claus got caught watching porn or something. I associate Miles with happiness. This is not happy. … Continue reading The Thing (2011)

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Wynonna Judd: Between Hell and Hallelujah

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Paramount Plus English Audio Description??: Yes This could have been an even darker film had Wynonna chosen to spend the duration talking about her mother. However, this is less about the tragic way Naomi Judd left us so suddenly, and more about how Wynonna put herself together, with the help of country music, to go ahead with the promised tour that was supposed to be her and Naomi. I’ve always known who The judds were, but never could claim being a massive fan. But the pacing of this film, and the care it takes in telling … Continue reading Wynonna Judd: Between Hell and Hallelujah

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History Of The World Part 1

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Hulu English Audio Description?: No No matter which film critic you follow, we all have the same problem. Catching up. It’s only getting worse for newer, younger film buffs attempting at becoming film criticism, because their list of films that they need to see is even longer. So, as this was made before i was born, this was on my catch up list. And while I have familiarized myself with the genius of Mel Brooks, it wasn’t this film. Then, hulu decided to do an awful Part 2, and I really needed to see how big … Continue reading History Of The World Part 1

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In A Valley Of Violence

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Netflix English Audio Description Provided By: Nicol Sansorella One of those random out of nowhere reviews. Honestly, I likely would have continued to pass up on this film until i noticed that it was directed by Ti West. I wanted to see what he had in the tank when not making a straight up horror film. The idea that West was making a revenge western was almost as intriguing as that time Eli Roth made the family friendly The house With A Clock In It’s Walls. When a director becomes synonymous with a specific genre, it … Continue reading In A Valley Of Violence

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Ant Man and the Wasp

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Disney Plus English Audio Description Provided By: Deluxe No, we’re not at QuantumMania yet. I revisited the first two bug hero films to get my bearings before going full on QuantumMania. That task just seems so daunting. I’ve never experienced QuantumMania before, and I’m not sure what that will be like. In the second film, Scott is on home arrest, trying to pay his penance for the events of Civil War. Of course, soon enough, he has to rejoin with the rest of the Ant-Man family, and Hope, who is now the Wasp. There’s more backstory … Continue reading Ant Man and the Wasp

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Moon Age Daydream

John Stark

Where I Watched it: HBo MAX English Audio Description?: Yes I’m not really a David Bowie fan. I’m also not anti-Bowie either. But, I think this experience is best suited for people who want to be submerged in the glory of Ziggy Stardust in all his illustrious glory. Casual fans will not get the same experience. Honestly, neither will members of the Blind and Visually Impaired communities. The film is almost like a photo diary, capturing Bowie as he was, through his own comments, and through his music and performances. often these come in the form of montages, which are … Continue reading Moon Age Daydream

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Champions

John Stark

Where i Watched It: Peacock English Audio Description Available?: Yes i was apparently living in a parallel dimension when I chose to watch this on Peacock back when it first dropped. For me, i saw two alternate audio English tracks, but neither was listed to me as having audio description at the time, nor did either track have audio description. Then, almost immediately after I brought it up, suddenly I became the only person I know of who had this problem, because everyone else could access the AD. When I went back to double check, I saw one of the … Continue reading Champions

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Peter Pan And Wendy

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Disney Plus English Audio Description Provided By: Deluxe Narrated By: Marsha Bartenelli Sometimes you’ll hear a critic talk about whether or not a project or film has a voice or perspective. When it comes down to something that’s been done to death, and you have other versions, then that question is more relevant. What is this film trying to say that hasn’t been said before? Why now? Why this version? I just don’t think that, despite David Lowry’s best intentions, that this film revolutionizes anything. It didn’t refresh anything. It barely tried to be even slightly … Continue reading Peter Pan And Wendy

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Scream 6

John Stark

Where I Watched It?: Paramount plus English Audio Description?: Yes “Hello Sidney. Remember me?: :This isn’t Sidney. you have the wrong number.” “Wait. Where is Sidney?” “Who knows. The producers didn’t want to pay Neve Campbell her asking price to reprise the role, but she sends her love.” Six films into this franchise, and it’s official. Sidney Prescott is no longer the final girl of her own franchise. That mantle has now been taken by Sam (Melissa Barrera), and arguably the other three that survived Scream 5. Scream: The New Generation finds the survivors of the most recent Woodsboro murders … Continue reading Scream 6

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John Wick Chapter 2

John Stark

Where I Watched it: peacock English Audio Description?: no As part of my quest to see all the john Wick films again, while they were still on peacock, this didn’t have audio description. A film like this not having audio description is pointless. The john Wick franchise is not known for expository dialogue. It’s known for long sequences of well choreographed violence that weave throughout the whole film. Truthfully, I’ve already seen this. The first two films in the franchise pre-dated my blindness, so I could play around with sitting down to talk about why this film doesn’t work without … Continue reading John Wick Chapter 2

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Eyes wide Shut

John Stark

Where I Watched it: HBo MAX English Audio Description?: no This is sort of cheating. I’m catching up on reviews, and i watched this on HBo MAX on what was apparently its last day. i went to the ‘Last Chance” row and picked it from there. I wanted to see, would it have audio description? nope. Eyes Wide shut is a weird one for me. Growing up, when i was a little kid, I didn’t watch R rated movies. But once I started into the double digits, certain ones started working their way in. Eventually, i basically never heard No, … Continue reading Eyes wide Shut

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Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: once and Always

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Netflix English Audio Description?: Yes Written By: Andrew piper So I heard Netflix was working on some Power Ranger thing. I didn’t know what that meant, and I don’t know what to tell you. I feel like I fever dreamed this and it isn’t real. I think someone Micro dosed me and I imagined this. There is no grade for this film. Much like how there’s a multiverse we talk about in films, I believe this film comes from a world where the grading scale has been elevated to emojis. Nothing makes sense. up is down. … Continue reading Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: once and Always

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Ant Man

John Stark

Where I Watched it: Disney Plus English Audio Description provided By: Deluxe Narrated By: Helen Vasee I feel pretty confident that a Marvel movie that opened in February and was not exactly welcomed with open arms should be dropping this month. We do have Memorial Day coming up, and Disney has both Avatar 2 and Ant Man 3. if neither of them drop, then Bob Iger sucks. That’s just the answer to that equation. Wakanda Forever dropped in November, and hit Disney plus right at the top of February. Ant Man is less fantastic, and we’re already at may 12th. … Continue reading Ant Man

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Ghosted

John Stark

Where i Watched it: Apple Plus English Audio Description Provided By Pixel logic Narrated By Chelsea Kay This is the kind of boring derivative romantic comedy that gets shoved to streaming services nowadays. if there’s one thing that streaming has done, it’s murder the romcom genre. It’s so rare that one ever gets to go to theatres anymore, and if that one fails, it’s just used as more file to send the next ten to streaming. Just look at this year. Films starring Jennifer Lopez and josh Duhmael and Ashton Kutcher and Reese Witherspoon have all gone to streaming. Meanwhile, … Continue reading Ghosted