2014 In Review: The Worst Pictures and Performances

Before we get into the big categories, I’m going to dive a bit into what I hated about 2014.

WORST PERFORMANCE OF THE YEAR:
10) Nicolas Cage (Left Behind)
He does deliver some pretty awful performances, which is shocking for an Oscar winning actor. It should be offensive that Oscar winning actors are even on this list, but a few winners and nominees are.

9) Ronda Rousey (The Expendables 3)
Needs acting lessons.

8) Will Smith (Winter’s Tale)
It’s like he wasn’t given a script, and instead was given flash cards, but they were blurry and he couldn’t really read them. Probably the worst performance given by Will Smith, ever.

7) Jason Dohring (Veronica Mars)
Easily the worst thing about the movie. This dude cannot act, and has no range of emotions.

6) Sullivan Stapleton (300: Rise Of An Empire)
Wooden. Needs acting lessons. Needs a personality.

5) Mila Kunis (The Angriest Man In Brooklyn)
Truly an uninspired performance. Mila Kunis is not believable as a doctor.

4) Emma Stone (Magic In The Moonlight)
I hated her in this, and I love Emma Stone. I thought she brought down the whole film. Not everyone can do Woody Allen, and watching Emma Stone attempt was painful.

3) Russell Crowe (Winter’s Tale)
Really a terrible film overall, but it is probably notable for featuring Will Smith’s worst performance ever, and Russell Crowe’s worst performance ever.

2) Amber Heard (3 Days To Kill)
This girl can barely act as it is, let alone be a CIA spy, or a spy who is inexplicably higher in rank or in charge of something. Stop giving Amber Heard difficult roles. She can’t act.

1) Cassi Thomson (Left Behind)
I wish God would rapture just Cassi Thomson so I never have to see her act in anything ever again.

THE WORST FILMS OF 2014:
10) Godzilla
Actually gave me a migraine.

9) 3 Days To Kill
Awful.

8) Winter’s Tale
Very pretty to look at, but awful to have to sit through. The plot is ridiculous.

7) Transformers: Age Of Extinction
Way too long. Felt like two different movies. Dinobots were silly. Pointless.

6) Dumb and Dumber To
Such a massive disappointment. Seth Macfarlane presents Dumb and Dumber would have been funnier if Seth Macfarlane actually presented it, instead of just the film being inspired by his brand of absurdist humor.

5) Someone Marry Barry
Luckily, probably no one actually saw this awful Tyler Labine comedy… and I love Tyler Labine.

4) I Frankenstein
Should have been called I Suck.

3) The Angriest Man In Brooklyn
We lost Robin Williams this year, so it pains me to put this on the list, but this is a truly awful film.

2) Left Behind
Shockingly, not the worst film of the year.

1) 300: Rise Of An Empire
I still hate everything about this film. Boring. Void of personality. Crude. Violent for no reason. It took everything that was great about the first 300 and shat it into a blender and hoped no one would notice.

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