Lyle Lyle Crocodile

Where I Watched It: Netflix

English Audio Description?: Yes

I’ve seen this film compared to Paddington, but honestly that’s just disrespectful to Paddington. I suppose because both films originated as kids books, and Lyle is beloved somewhere, but Paddington and its sequel are actually good films. hell, even Clifford The Big Red Dog has a narrative that isn’t gibberish. This thing is awful.

From the minute Javier Bardem starts the film as a failed magician, and there’s a bout of singing, I know I’m in for something. But when Shaun Mendes steps in to autotune Lyle, it seems like a SNL skit from that point on. Like I’m not getting the joke, but everyone else is in on it.

I saw a lot of kids films last year, or family films aimed at kids, so I’m not someone who just immediately tosses these under the bus. I like this type of thing more often than not, but I absolutely hated this film. I’m not really sure what I can find to say positive here, except that it is not Marmaduke. And honestly, there were a few films I gave a D- to last year that perhaps when i factor in that little kids like shiny things, they might find some level of distraction here. I wanted to jump off this train. I don’t even have anything constructive to say about the audio description. I spent most of the film trying to pretend it wasn’t happening, and as soon as i could get the hell out of there I did.

This does have a decent IMDB and critics rankings, all things considered, so maybe I’m in my own lifeboat. But at least my lifeboat is coherent, and doesn’t feature Lyle.

Final Grade: D

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