Tag: Roy Samuelson

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It’s A Wonderful Binge

John Stark

Where I Watched It: hulu English Audio Description Provided By: Pointe 360 Narrated By: Roy Samuelson Many moons ago, Nostradamus predicted that two children of the devil would be born, and unto the world, they would completely miss the boat on how to make parody/spoof films, and thus their reign of terror would result in a series of films that are universally despised. This includes everything from the aptly titled Date movie and Epic Movie to Meet The Spartans and The Hungover Games. If you told me they directed this, i would not be shocked. This film, which shockingly features … Continue reading It’s A Wonderful Binge

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The Tree Of Life

John Stark

Where I Watched it: HBo MAX English Audio Description Provided by: Point 360 Written By: Connor DeWolfe Narrated By: Roy Samuelson I’ve seen quite a few documentaries this year, and I have no idea which ones are even eligible for Oscar’s consideration. but, if there is any justice in this, The Tree Of Life will make the cut. It’s sad that this film exists. It exists only because a racist walked into a synagogue and decided to start shooting people based on his anti-Semitic beliefs. Had that never happened, this documentary would not exist. Really, any documentary based on a … Continue reading The Tree Of Life

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Matriarch

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Hulu English Audio Description Provided By Point 360 Narrated By: Roy Samuelson I laughed basically all the way through my YouTube review version of this. Not because the film is funny, but because it is totally and completely bonkers. Yesterday, in the real world, I was mentioning some of the more recent titles I had seen that felt wholly original as horror titles, and not just retreads, and that’s half the reason I gave Matriarch decent marks. I’m still, a week later, not sure what I watched. I don’t know that I will ever fully understand … Continue reading Matriarch

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Grimcuddy

John Stark

Where I Watched It: hulu Audio Description Provided By: Point 360 Narrated By: Roy Samuelson Hulu continues its barrage of horror titles this October with a horror title about a meme gone wild that stars Shannon Sossamon. Really, that’s all you need to know. Right? Grimcuddy is a meme, a rather well described creepy as hell meme that comes to life and haunts kids that participate supposedly in its challenge. Basically, parents think their kids are cutting themselves to serve this meme, but these kids can actually see Grimcuddy. And after the attack, they are left with cuts, and the … Continue reading Grimcuddy

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Let Me in

John Stark

Where I Watched It: Netflix Audio Description Provided By: Zoo Digital Written By: John Gray Narrated By: Roy Samuelson Admittedly, I could have seen this film visually. I remember critics enjoyed it, and Matt Reeves is a very talented director who has given us several amazing films, including The Batman earlier this year. But, I passed on this, not because I passed on gore, but because the original, the foreign language Let The Right One in, is perfect, and actually my favorite foreign language title of all time. I didn’t need a remake. If Martin Scorsese remade The Godfather, I’m … Continue reading Let Me in

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Good Luck To you Leo Grande

John Stark

Starring: Emma Thompson and Daryl McCormack Directed By: Sophie Hyde Where I Watched it: hulu English Audio Description Available?: Yes Description Written by: Steven Pelletier Narrated By: Roy Samuelson Provided By: Zoo Digital The Plot: A middle aged widow (Thompson) feeling unfulfilled in her sexual life thus far enlists the services of a male escort, Leo Grande (McCormack) to help her feel less disconnected, and check some things off her bucket list. But as the two converse, Leo shows her a world she’s unfamiliar with, and gives her an experience where she feels like the only woman in the world. … Continue reading Good Luck To you Leo Grande

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Old

John Stark

Starring: Gael Garcia Bernal, Vicky Krieps, Rufus Sewell, Alex Wolff, Thomasin McKenzie, and Embeth Davidtz. Directed By: M Night Shyamalan Where i Watched It: HBO MAX English Audio Description Available?: Yes Description Provided By: The Media Acccess Group Narrated By: Roy Samuelson The Plot: On a remote beach, a group of random strangers have all won a random trip to a swanky resort, where a quick day trip to an isolated part of the island leaves them trapped in a place where time moves at its own speed, and these strangers start aging rapidly. Can they escape before it’s too … Continue reading Old

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Venom Let There Be Carnage

John Stark

Starring: Tom Hardy, Woody Harrelson, Michelle Williams, Naomie Harris, Reid Scott, Peggy Lou, and Stephen Graham. Directed By: Andy Serkis Where I Watched It: VOD (though it is currently on Starz) English Audio Description Available?: Yes Description Provided By: The media Access Group narrated By: Roy Samuelson The Plot: Because he made a lot of money the last time around, Venom (Hardy) is back, in a convoluted storyline that involves a Bonnie and Clyde type relationship between a serial killer (Harrelson) and his love (Harris) that is locked away in an asylum. After he bites Eddie Brock (also Hardy), our … Continue reading Venom Let There Be Carnage